6 PRO JOB HUNTING TIPS

Sitting in your sweat pants waiting for the phone to ring while job hunting is a daunting task.  Tossing out your resumes into the wild blue yonder, yielding a myriad of rejections emails, from employer after employer can leave you (a tech professional or any professional for that matter) a bit discouraged at times.  The economy crash a few years ago didn’t make this any easier, sadly.

Lets face the actual truth that many employers, due to the technological age, if they are behind the times, have a “candidate black hole”.  You know that place, the mystical, magical place, where your work history, and personal information goes off to die on some server where once glanced over information failed to make the proper impression?  Over qualified, under qualified, salary requests too high, equal immediate black hole resumes.  It makes you wonder if the magical porridge will ever be “just right”.  I can promise that Neil deGrasse Tyson won’t show up in that black hole with your resume/ CV, nor will the 3 bears give a crap about your porridge.

Being recently back in the job market myself, and now on the West Coast, I have had the ability to see both sides of this amazing process.  Some companies have an expedited process that either parses your resume for relevant information, or some Universities, that have the MOST time consuming and atrocious processes for applications I have ever seen.  Companies like Facebook, Apple, Google, Microsoft, and EA have very expedited processes, where you can create a basic profile, apply, and move on.  Their HR people simply don’t have enough time during the day to process the amount of information they receive, although they have the means to track it fairly efficiently.

In 15 days, I have had 2 phone interviews thus far, both positions I’m very qualified for, but then the clock ticking begins, and the inner pressure builds as you wait patiently for the next response (if any).  Of course, the initial phone call after your first 100 resumes, no matter how quickly it comes, puts a bounce in your step, a beat in your heart, and music straight into your ear buds! It’s happy dance time!  Of course, these feelings of emotion spring to exhilaration on the 2nd call, or absolute despair when the email arrives you’ve been shot down, because somehow you managed to answer the irrelevant question, “What is your inner power animal?” incorrectly.  Don’t say squirrel. Seriously. Don’t do it.

Personally, my favorite interview questions are the technical ones; that no one is prepared to answer. In my mind, if you have solid references, a good work history, the technical side will be apparent in your history. Of course, NEVER say, “I’d stab the guy who logged into the VCS for no reason!” It’s kinda like telling airport customs in Europe, “The reason for my trip today is so I can take a dump in the EU.” It’s just not going to go over so well.  The truth is, while you can log into a device, and find out what damage was done, there are a million correct answers to this obvious hypothetical technical question.

One of the jobs I am currently in the running for REQUIRES 10 years of experience in a specific area.  Which is kinda silly. The technology they are using didn’t really even exist in the fashion it does now.  Sure, I had experience in working with that technology back then, but I used it to make phone calls home while traveling for a different career. 10 years ago, the iPhone didn’t exist. A blackberry was a separate device than your phone. Flat panel TV’s weighed a ton, and they cost the same amount of money as a cheap car. I’m still qualified, and hope I’m their guy!

My point is, in some cases, some questions just aren’t realistic, but if your still waiting for the phone to ring, chances are your more worried about your wallet, bank account, family, or the fact you’re staying on a buddies couch because somehow you’re back “in the market” for a new job.  You don’t want to sound desperate when the phone does ring, and it will eventually, be sure you let the recruiter on the other end of the phone know how much they brightened your day.  I’m sure they often forget you’re shoving out resumes like your kid is about to go hungry, and you don’t always remember which position you applied to where.

Sometimes it’s not easy, but me for example, if I put all my skills on paper it takes up 8+ pages.  No HR person would ever read that crap.  Ever.  Hell, I have friends in HR that would rather stab you with stapler than actually answer a, “How’s my resume look?” question.  They deal with 100’s of people, 100’s of attitudes, and send out 100’s of rejections regularly. Just let that sink in a moment.

Pro Job Hunting Tips

1. Write a solid 1-page resume. If you work in a specific field, highlight the high points, software, hardware, or being able to read blue prints… whatever it is you do.  Enter an executive “Summary” where the “Objective” used to be. Drop the “Objective” nonsense. Planning for 5 years down the road is nearly impossible in this economic climate anyway.  In 3 or 4 well-crafted sentences you should be able to state, what you do, have done, worked with, and your basic skill set. They’ll call and ask for specifics of you fit the bill.

2. List your last 10 years worth of career work. If you don’t have 10 years, then     make sure you list your education specifics. Beyond that, its silly, and unless you saved the planet, an HR person doesn’t give a crap. They’ll especially not give a crap if it’s over 1-page.  Two pages are a maximum. Even then you’re possibly playing catch with a trashcan.

3. An HR person should be able to determine in less than 5 minutes whether you’re qualified for the open position. Don’t apply for things you’re not qualified to do. You’re not only wasting their time, but your own.

4. If you do multiple things (like I do), make multiple resumes/ CV’s and also make different formats. .docx, .pdf, .doc, ect. It is not unusual to show that you care enough to tailor your resume to a specific position. Look like you give a crap. It shows! You have to sell yourself on paper to someone who doesn’t know you in less than a minute. You may be clever, witty, and possibly even the best in town, but if you skimp on “the awesome”, someone else already beat you to the job.

5. At the end of the day, it can all be VERY discouraging. Even after all this work, days, weeks, sometimes, even months can go by. Rejection after rejection.  Be persistent, and don’t give up. Some people may forget you’re human, and going out and waiting tables while trying to find real work is just as tough. Because that temp job knows you’ll leave once something real comes along. I know many IT nerds, and most of them would suck in retail, or customer service.  They are better off web building, directing your calls, or fixing your laptop, I promise.

6. Most importantly, when the phone DOES ring. Be polite, answer the questions as best you can, stay calm even though you want to climb out of your own skin you’re so happy.  When it goes well, be sure you tell the recruiter how much they made your day.  They’re human too. If they can make your dreams come true, they are also rewarded emotionally.  So, be kind first.  Be memorable. If you make it to round 2, you’re doing super.

Like most of you reading this, I am in the trenches along with you. Fighting for my next chance at where I hope will be my home career for years to come.  I am supposed to have a 2nd phone interview with the huge global company tomorrow. Wish me luck! I need it, but most of all, I’ve learned quite a bit about this process over the last couple weeks from the corporate side of the house.  I have hired many people in my life as well, so I hope all of you can learn something from my own trials and failures.  Find something you love, not just a paycheck.

Lastly, and most importantly… DO NOT GIVE UP!

Cheers,

Christian

Seeking Redemption (Not Religious)

Disclaimer- this is NOT a religious post.

Seeking Redemption-

Everyone is searching for some sort of personal redemption. A few weeks ago I left my family in Costa Rica and returned home to the United States. I had received some information that my former employer was ready for me to return to Washington DC.  I came home to what inevitably turned into a 1099 contractor limbo.  I love my employer in D.C. more than any other career location I have ever had. From the CEO on down, the staff is nothing short amazing. However, the recent snowstorm weather, HR being out of the office, and just overall limbo, I have been forced to go out to look for more steady employment.

In the meantime, I drove down to Central Georgia to visit my high-school friends whom I hadn’t seen in many months, while patiently waiting for a call from work. I received a call from a friend on the West Coast who has just landed a new job with Microsoft in San Francisco.  I rented out my condo in Costa Rica, and I booked a ticket to San Francisco from Atlanta.  

In my life, I can honestly say I’ve lived a pretty charmed existence. I’ve been fortunate enough to see the world and do nearly everything I’ve ever wanted to do. Don’t get me wrong, not every scenario is a winner. However, this past week in San Francisco has been one of the best weeks of my life. I sincerely feel like I have won the lottery, and having a friend gracious enough to let me surf his couch for a few weeks while I work on building a new life is nothing short of miraculous. 

Now, let me point out, that starting over is not an easy endeavor. It involves a tremendous amount of wear and tear on the mind, body, soul, and lets be honest—“The worst part about having a job, is finding one.”  I must have sent out 100 resumes over the last week, and of course, being a bit of a perfectionist, I’ve redone all of my resumes about 20x each.  It is necessary to have several different resumes, and occasionally having to mold it to an actual posted position.  My resume, if I actually put all of my skills, and background history on it, is about 8 pages long.  Thus, I’ve made a single summary page with the basics.  HR managers simply don’t care if you once saved the planet if it’s more than a page long. Chances are someone else did too, and it was only one page.

I had a great interview with a company yesterday that caught my attention in many ways, but most of all the recruiter herself was Hungarian. What a phenomenal phone interview. Not only because I felt it went well and I was qualified for the position, but I was talking with someone else who came here to this city, and made it her home. She also loved her employer and found joy in what she did everyday. There’s not many people who can say that. 

About the same time I was leaving Georgia, another acquaintance of mine was doing the exact same thing.  He had spoke to me on Facebook, a few months back about Seattle. I had told him I lived there for a short time before, so he had plenty of questions. He was looking to escape the great southern stigma against people with tattoos and piercings, among other things.  He works in the restaurant industry as a chef, and in our conversations, he told me he was leaving for Seattle the exact same day I was flying out to San Francisco, except he was going by bus. He had no one to meet him when he arrived there, no friends to speak of in the city; only a dream of a better life tucked away in his back pocket, next to a handful of hope. 

We chatted back and forth via text message the majority of his trip, and since I have driven that route a few times, I gave him a few tips of when to keep his eyes peeled out the window. I wanted him to look at how beautiful the countryside is and the mountains along I-90, especially in the Idaho panhandle.  The roads twist and turn as they wrap alongside snowy mountaintops as if they were out of a postcard in a roadside Howard Johnson.

I told him I would connect him with a few friends of mine who live in the Seattle area so he wouldn’t be alone.  As I am a firm believer, there is nothing worse in this world than being in a huge city with no friends, no place to live, and having to find a job starting from scratch.  Within his first 24 hours my friends came through in FINE style. They fed him, got him a few drinks, and even a job opportunity working under a Su Chef there, in downtown Seattle.  I’m not 100% sure, but I hope I helped Chris find his internal redemption. 

Redemption means many things to many people. To me, personal salvation has nothing to do with religion at all.  It is finding your direction wherever it points.  Like the needle on a compass spinning under a magnet, where the staccato notes are slowly swept into chords of memory making a new resonance that firm us onto a new foundation, now supplanted into our collective reverie.

Right now, I am living vicariously by the grace and kindness of my friend Dan and a little bit of money I have saved along the way. Wish me luck my friends and fellow travelers. I believe I have finally found where I am supposed to be.

Life has a way of taking us places we are meant to go, and with kindness in my heart I hope the Hungarian recruiter who made my day yesterday has a new occupational home for me as well. 

Cheers from San Francisco!!!!

Senses, Memory, and Building Metaphor

In our universe, there is an infinite number of possibilities, some filled with mystery, others well known, and again some to remain finite.   However, our five senses are majestic in their power to drive our emotions far beyond what is just a simple mindset.  As a writer, I often have to dwell on emotions in order to convey them in metaphor, thus what is written becomes a complete memory and not just a simple fragmented thought.

A dear friend and fellow writer sent me an audio recording yesterday of him talking in his slow southern drawl, about the sound of a slow rain across a tin roof and how it invoked past memories of his mother Pearl and her once notoriety as a singer in early radio.   As he continued, he made a metaphor of the sound alone "is like the crackling of a campfire".  Anyone who has been camping in their life knows that sound, late at night, when there is the dead silence, where it's only you, the sounds of the forest, and that crackling of a campfire; those who are city dwellers-- or those from the north may not have heard the sound of a slow rain across a tin roof.   It is a mesmerizing sound; so loud that it will overwhelm the senses.  "A man can get plain lost in that sound" as my dear friend had so eloquently expressed.

As a young child, I remember my mother taking me across the deep south, across Alabama, into Mississippi, and eventually ending up near Biloxi, on the Delta.  We were visiting her old friends, and family members that I haven't seen since.  Most of whom, when I was a child were already in their 70's and lived in old Southern, rural homes.   I have fond memories of those times, but alas the only sound I truly remember is the amazing sound of rain on the tin roofs.  The soft, slow, and steady rain wraps your mind around a peacefulness, and a hard storm, creates a drowning roar, that can consume every worldly thought.

As a teenager, once moving formally to the Deep South to live with my father and my beloved step mother MK.  I had already come to realize how music was more than a dream that I wanted to play professionally, but I deeply loved how the sound of a particular song could evoke deeply held emotions, and a resonating longing toward almost any kind of personal nostalgia.  However, at this age is where moving from the city to a new place in the south, I became aware of another sense that became one almost as captivating.

During the summer in central Georgia, the dusk is an amazing time.  It releases all the smells from the heat of the day, as if the long grass were a type of pie in an oven, and just as sweet.   It permeates the air, consuming the mind and body, and still to this day, when I return there, the smells instantly fill my mind of that happy youthful time when riding in the back of a truck wasn't considered dangerous, driving tractors (as I grew up on a horse ranch) was a daily occurrence, and sitting on the porch playing blues on my guitar with my next door neighbors in my first apartment I had at 17.  I mention that time, because my first apartment was in a poverty stricken area in Warner Robins, Georgia. I was the minority in this predominantly African-American neighborhood, but as people sat on their front porches, I would bring my guitar outside, play some 12 bar blues, and this old man, probably in his mid 70's would play harmonica.   We kept our neighbors consumed, singing & dancing, and it was probably one of my most memorable times at that age.  Even now, thinking of that smell of the grass deep in my nose reveals so many memories, I wouldn't be able to capture them all here if I tried, but it warms my heart with a whirlwind of all that was at that time.

It is phenomenal to me that how the slightest sense of one immediately becomes the sense of another.  For me, the smells and sounds instantly bring back visual memories of a time that was much more simple, less the digital and wireless leashes that tie us to our occupations.

In 1991, traveling back to Virginia Beach after being away in Georgia for a little over a year and a half.  As I entered the state and began getting closer to the mouth of the James River; I could smell the salt of the ocean as if I were a long time mariner pining for the calm of the still waters, but still weeping the emotions of the amazing power that is the sea.

It was during this time I had had a deeper longing for my first true love, one that would play a true game of attrition with me over the next 20 plus years of my life.  Many people hold dear to their passions for the past, or the people whom have helped shape their life.  She was absolutely no exception to this rule.  In later years it would prove fatal to many other relationships of mine, mostly due to the jealous nature of others and their propensity in belief that everyone is at heart dishonest.  Sadly, that is untrue and jealousy simply distorts reality.

In the late summer of 1994, I returned to Georgia where I had went to high school, and reconnected with my first love.  Her touch was as soft as the autumn winds, caressing each leaf, whispering on the air in a careless flow of acrobatics, and then at last returning to the ground to become stable with only the memory of a time when life was more carefree. Moment to moment we live on the touch of others in our lives.   I was fortunate that she impacted my life in such an amazing way in those formative years.  Perhaps it was the innocence of the time, but moreover it allowed me to appreciate the other people I have had in my life since and possibly in a more equitable way.

Love and hope are two of the most under estimated emotions.  They both miraculously have the ability to make, or break a persons spirit.  We can easily wrap our entire consciousness in our 5 senses.  Just like the taste sugar or salt on our lips; our memories glide back and forth swinging from memory to heartbreak like Newtons cradle, exhibiting the 3rd law of physics as if each memory was as physical as the neurons that shift from receptor to receptor in our brain.

Not every memory we carry is one filled with pleasant nostalgia, but often many memories can swing us to the darker times when mourning the loss of a relationship or loved one is as devastating as the initial grief that created the memory.  We are a complicated species after all, but the only one on this planet capable of deeper reasoning.

Your life is an amazing story, one you control with each of your five senses, even being born with or now living without, another skill will always present itself, and bind your passions into a physical manifestation of neurons in a wisp inside your brain.  It will, after all leave an indelible mark on your life.  If all the time you had left on this planet was today, would your last thoughts be a memory worth dying for? You have at least 5 senses-- don't waste them or the small amount of time you get to experience what they are capable of.

The most terrible mistake one can make is to delay what you want to do in your life with the presumption you'll have time to do it later.

©2013 Christian's Theory

Leaving the US and moving to Costa Rica

“Your mom has Dengue”.  A set of sobering words from my father via Skype in Costa Rica; I had already been well aware of the flu she had previous, but now suddenly the situation was more serious as she was already sick before, with a now crippled immune system.  In less than 3 weeks time, I would be sitting on a plane to give my parents a much needed hand in what many people see outwardly as a 3^rd world country. 

My parents had moved to Costa Rica 3 years prior to live a bit easier as permanent resident “pensioners”.  That said, Costa Rica has some of the most consistent weather patterns in the world, beautiful beaches, socialized and for profit medicine, and most definitely there is no shortage of North American expatriates living out the remainder of their lives here abroad.  The medical systems in Costa Rica are more than adequate, but if you’re from anywhere in the Western World, as with nearly everything here, much of it operates significantly differently, and learning the ropes is better done in advance vs. learning by necessity. 

After arriving here in early October, which is the last month of the “rainy season”, my longing for the dry days ahead in November through April is now slowly becoming a reality, and the North American & European tourists are now arriving in droves to the province of Guanacaste; the North Western Coast line that follows the Pan American Highway all the way up to the Nicaraguan boarder.

North Western Costa Rica

I found out quickly, that securing a long term residence here in Costa Rica literally gets harder by the day (if you plan to rent close to November).  As the tourists arrive, the thousands of rental properties that remain empty all year, which can normally be rented for a few hundred dollars a month (depending on the size & need of course) in the off-season, can command upwards of a few thousand a week based on location & size.  I personally went from searching for a place, finding a rental, and it being already rented by the time I drove 15 minutes up the road to view the property!  Needless to say, once I found a place (a small studio apartment across the street from the beach) that was actually available; I immediately decided to go back to the rental office to discuss price.  This small studio apartment (less than 500sqft), rents for $500 USD a month + utilities long term, or if you’re willing to spend the cash up front (I do mean CASH literally), you can get a smoking deal as everything rentable can be negotiated easily, but during the high season the rates are not so easily affordable for some.    

The flat I rented dropped down to only  $350 dollars a month if I paid the entire 6 months in advance in cash, plus the security deposit.  While to some this may seem like an exorbitant amount of money to pay out considering I don’t know how long I plan to be here, there are many who will pay 5x what I am paying total to stay only a few weeks in a similar space.  I certainly don’t have that kind of money as a writer, but I’m far from destitute, and still living on the cheap in one of the most popular beach towns in the world, Playas Del Coco.  Take into account, a North American version of “cheap” is considerably different than the local “Tico’s”.  My studio apartment maybe small, but it is fully furnished, pots, pans, dishes, sheets on the bed, cable TV, and is actually better than most of the efficiencies I’ve stayed in throughout Europe, or even on the eastern seaboard of the US.   Did I mention I am directly across the street from the beach and Pacific Ocean?

My new home in Playas Del Coco

I relocated here from right outside Washington DC, and I have previously been here to visit my family; so I had an idea of what to expect when I arrived, but I’ve only been here a month, and still have much more to learn!

The locals are polite and kind beyond measure compared to many other countries I’ve visited.  That said, I’m not entirely sure that “no” is even in their vocabulary.  They would rather bring you anything, but “no” as an answer… So you can completely expect random stuff occasionally.   Even at the local grocery store I came across this "complete" cooking seasoning.  Not only is it the only one you apparently need, but judging by the size of the container it's the only one you'll need FOREVER! 

Top Chef never had it so easy! 

One thing that stands out for me personally; I am constantly trying to better my Spanish and speak their language, but the locals at the same time desperately want to practice their English.  So, what happens is, even ordering a drink, or meal can turn out to be a mixture of English, Spanish, Spanglish, but however the majority of the young people in bars and restaurants speak FAR better English than my Spanish, and when you compliment them on how good their English is, they are always very flattered, say that their “English isn’t very good”, and then say “thank you for saying so”.  My 2^nd week here, I met a local “Nica” (slang for Nicaraguan) tour guide in a bar who prefaced his spontaneous conversation with me with, “I have a question for you, but please bear with me, as my English isn’t very good…” and then while I’m expecting some Spanglish; instead his vocabulary and correct grammar blew me away.  I have never met anyone in my life that says his or her English isn’t very good, and in that first sentence use the word “reciprocation”!

Needless to say, my adventure here in Costa Rica has only just begun. My mom is now mostly recovered from her Dengue Fever, and my father is back to being just as ornery as he’s always been.  Either way, I’m still around to help them out and enjoy a journey that is still very much my own to create.  I certainly have plenty to write about! 

Pura Vida!